Today Marks 15 Years Since Season Finale of 'Seinfeld'
OMG, just looking at this picture makes me want to cry. It's been 15 years since the season finale of Seinfeld aired, and yet it's still one of the most relevant TV shows that's being reran today. Okay, maybe the clothing is a little different (but not too far off from some of the trends of late, especially those of Elaine's), but the cast, their friendships, and their stories are timeless and will forever be relatable. We've all had out own Seinfeld moments in life, so I'd like to take the time to honor some of those hand-to-face moments with the help of some of my favorite Seinfeldian words. —Ally
Seinfeld was essentially "The Show About Nothing." Following a group of four friends, the show focused on the most mundane and simplest #whitepeopleproblems to ever exist.
Episodes were filled mainly with interactions with strangers, but there were many returning characters, such as neighbors, family members, ex-girlfriends and bosses. These interactions fueled the show, causing dramatic sequences, and putting the group into hysterical situations that you or someone you know have dealt with before.
With each story, a word or phrase would come about to explain the situation at hand. While you might have your own terms in your friendship circle, here are some Jerry, Elaine, George and Kramer's best Seinfeldian words and phrases with their meanings (via Wikipedia).
Assman: 1) A Proctologist 2) A person who displays his/her name on vanity license plates
Close Talker: One who speaks to a person at point blank range (usually with both peoples' noses less than a foot away from the other)
Festivus: A made up holiday
Get Out!: What a woman might say to her friends in complete surprise (while at the same time shoving them backwards)
Head-First Parker:A person who tries to pull into a parking space head first as opposed to backing into the space, possibly with the intention of screwing someone else out of the space
Jerk Store: A phrase that is used as part of a put-down by a naive person who can't think of any better put-downs to use
Key Brothers: Friends who exchange each others' apartment or house keys, with the provisional that they follow the key covenant
Little Kicks: A horrendous dance performed by a seemingly attractive woman, in which she completely turns off coworkers and friends alike
Manzire: A bra created for older men who have excess flab in the upper chest area and give the appearance of having breasts
Mulva: What to call your current girlfriend if you can't remember her name
Pre-Emptive Break-Up: When a man anticipates that his girlfriend is going to break up with him, so he breaks up with her first (so that he can have hand)
The Puffy Shirt: 1) A funny looking white shirt with ruffles in the front, and puffy looking long sleeves, similar to what pirates would wear 2) What to wear when being a guest on a TV talk show
Shrinkage: 1) What happens to a man's genitalia after being in contact with water (especially cold water) 2) What to tell a woman who mistakenly sees a man's genitalia in the shrunken stage, and finds it humorous
Spare A Square: What to ask a person if one happens to be in a public bathroom stall and runs out of toilet paper
Vandelay Industries: 1) A fictitious company which manufactures latex 2) A company which is made up by someone who is out of work and is trying to convince the Department of Unemployment that he/she is being considered for a job with the fictitious company to keep up his/her unemployment benefits
Yada, Yada, Yada: What a person might say, mid-sentence, to shorten a story to get to the point of a discussion or to hide any incriminating activities
Have you seen this Mars One thing yet? It's literally the most terrifying prospect I've ever seen, and for once in my life I am not being hyperbolic. Basically people are applying to go to Mars and never come back. If you need to take a minute to lie down and have a panic attack, I understand. If you're selected for the mission, you'll fly off to Mars to live in an inflatable pod until you die because scientists don't yet have the technology to bring people back. AUUUGH. I know. It's terrible. Earth is full of too many delightful things that make me never want to leave. Here are some of them. —Katie
Friends What if you get to Mars and you realize you don't like any of the three people you're going to be living with forever? Every two years, four more astronauts will be shot up to Mars to chill with you, but, man, that is some slim pickins. What if no one gets your humor? Or likes to talk about the movie Twilight? You'll be forced to talk to a volleyball, a la Wilson. French Fries I bet diehard Mars fans will be like, "Whatever, I don't need french fries. I will be fine crunching on this dehydrated ice cream sandwich. Space exploration rocks! McDonald's is the downfall of America, anyway."
All of those people are liars. Cuties Mars wouldn't have an abundance of cute people to crush on. It would have approximately eight people to maybe crush on. This is considered a fate worse than death to some (me).
Air You know how sometimes you're like, "I'm going to step out for a bit of air"? Not gonna happen on Mars, buddy. On Mars it's like, "I'm going to step out in my gigantic spacesuit to go stare at this planet that looks exactly the same all over and imagine the wind blowing through my hair and also I will try not to cry because wiping my tears through my space helmet is pretty much impossible." And then you cry anyway.
Netflix Well, maybe Netflix would work on Mars, but it would probably always be buffering like crazy. So there you are, sitting in your inflatable house, watching the buffer screen go from 23%, down to 19%, and back up to 23%. Again you will try not to cry. Again you will fail.
Anything Fun If you're like, "Boy, I sure am getting a little stir-crazy here in my pod..." then your options are 1.) Go to another pod that is the same and probably occupied by someone you hate or 2.) Put on your giant spacesuit and go walk around in Mars dust. Gravity is lower on Mars so it might be fun to kick a rock for 20 minutes, but then the rock flies away and you're left with nothing but despair and the grim realization that you'll never again enjoy the simple things in life, like consuming a 64 oz. soda at a movie theater.
If we had to pick a theme song for day three of Coachella, it would be "Dust in the Wind," even though Kansas was no where in sight. But more on that later...
The day started out beautifully, with perfect weather and a gorgeous set from Wild Belle, who seem like they were made to play outdoors on a stage lined with palm trees.
From there, we made our way across the grounds to see Dave P (from Philadelphia and Making Time) and JDH in the Yuma tent. Our joke this trip has been that we can't go anywhere without hearing Stevie Nicks—from the Filter party to the Integratron to every Palm Springs radio station—which is awesome, because there's no such thing as too much Stevie. Therefore, when they played Fleetwood Mac's "Dreams," we were pretty sure that it was a sign that in the midst of the Coachella craziness, this was exactly where we needed to be.
And speaking of signs, we couldn't help but think that this one at the info booth seems maybe a tad bit optimistic?
As we left the Saguaro and headed back to Coachella, what had been a beautiful day suddenly took a turn and we found ourselves—and about 80,000 other people—in the middle of a serious dust storm. It brought to mind either a zombie apocalypse or Burning Man (and actually, is there really that much difference between the two?).
That didn't stop the crowd from going crazy during a Vampire Weekend set, and one of the happiest things we saw this weekend was this spontaneous circle dance of about 50 strangers. Coachella can be total madness with long lines, heat, dust, bros and a ton of other things to drive you crazy, but it's moments like this that remind you that everyone's just here to have a good time.
Ally's been crushing hard on Father John Misty, and his on-stage quips and ramblings only served to add fuel to the fire. If he did perform in a robot hat, I guess the down side would be that we wouldn't be able to see how cute he is?
Sunday night is when Coachella brings out the big guns that draw huge crowds. When the Wu-Tang "W" suddenly lit up the stage, it was like the bat signal and people took off running from all corners of the grounds to mob the show. We watched from what we guessed to be a half-mile back. We promise that the Clan is up there somewhere, just trust us.
Ditto for Red Hot Chili Peppers, where we were too far back to even pretend to take a picture, so here's one from the LA Times. Anthony Kiedis said he felt like he was in Lawrence of Arabia, which reminds us, did we mention the dust?
These festival-goers weren't the only ones who opted to huddle under their blanket instead of sit on top of it, and our associate social media manager Vanessa employed extreme measures to upload a Vine.
We all put on our sunglasses, even though it was after midnight, and ran to the car covering our faces. In the end, it was ok, because it just made us feel like we were Vanessa Hudgens running from the paparazzi. This is just SOME of what came off my face when I got in the car. So, thanks Coachella! We had a blast and will see you again in 2014. We should have all of this dirt out of our hair by then.—Kate
Lilly Pulitzer, a designer known for her fun and vibrant prints, passed away this weekend at the age of 81. Luckily her colorful dresses, once worn by Jacqueline Kennedy, will keep her legacy alive. There are some cute remembrances over on the Lilly Pulitzer site, and if you have any memories of your own, the site encourages you to leave a comment. Her first dresses came into existence because of her desire to hide the orange juice stains that always covered her clothing, and now, years later, her brand is a household name. Her success story will continue to remind us that one little idea is all it takes. —Katie
Our final day in Austin at the UO Backlot Sesh was so very bittersweet. Savoring the final moments under the tents watching Mood Rings, Pure X, Chris Cohen, Caveman, Ducktails, Mac Demarco and METZ was amazing, but we can't help but be sad it's over. A huge thanks to all the bands that played and to all of the fans for coming out and helping us live it up until the very end. Austin, we love you. Until next year... xoxo UO!
Listen up Austin! Today is the last day of our UO Backlot Sesh and we need your help. We have waaaaay too much free beer, and can't finish it on our own. So stop by the UT Campus store at 2406 Guadalupe to help us finish these cold Sixpoints and get the chance to catch Mood Rings, Pure X, Chris Cohen, Caveman, Ducktails, Mac Demarco and METZ. We're ready to go out with a bang after another year of awesome music, so don't miss it or you'll regret it later—I promise.
Apparently Jason Segel and Michelle Williams have called it quits and man, I really thought these guys were in it for the long haul. (◕︵◕) So many celebrity relationships have been crushing my dreams lately! I guess that's just the way it is in showbiz, but that doesn't mean I have to feel less destroyed by these relationships that will never directly affect me at all. Let's take a look at some other relationships that were supposed to renew all of our faith in love, but instead destroyed our hearts.—Katie
Will Arnett & Amy Poehler Love is dead, guys. Love. is. dead.
P. Diddy & J-Lo Was this my favorite celebrity pairing of all time? Yes. Like, I kind of want it to happen again. J-Lo is amazing! P. Diddy is hilarious! Their children would be beautiful, hilarious whirlwinds of money.
Ryan Gosling & Rachel McAdams Here is a fun personal anecdote: My boyfriend has a picture of himself next to Ryan Gosling and he looks like a monster. Ryan Gosling is too hot to exist next to normal people! That's why I'm convinced that Rachel and Ryan will find their way back to one another; they're both just too perfect looking to stray for long.
Heidi Klum & Seal I mean... there aren't even any words.
Jennifer Aniston & Brad Pitt Apparently their breakup happened 8 years ago, but it still feels fresh to me. Like, Brad Pitt is seriously dead2me until the end of time for hurting sweet baby Jen. She's had to deal with being "The Woman Who Will Never Be Lucky In Love" in every single tabloid since, so, yeah, you can go shave your back now, Brad.
Britney Spears & Justin Timberlake This entire photoshoot was so magical and led us all to believe that they'd be living in a storybook cottage for the rest of their days. But noooo, idiots had to go and break up.
Kanye West & Amber Rose Whatever, I loved these two. ONLY GOD CAN JUDGE ME.
Pauline Phillips, better known by her job title as Dear Abby, died Wednesday at the age of 94. Although she gave advice people could actually use, Phillips was also incredibly good at penning sassy one-liners to her readers. Let's take a look at what the NYT highlighted as some of the best advice Phillips doled out over her lifetime. If there was ever a role-model for getting it together, Phillips is it.—Katie
Dear Abby: My wife sleeps in the raw. Then she showers, brushes her teeth and fixes our breakfast — still in the buff. We’re newlyweds and there are just the two of us, so I suppose there’s really nothing wrong with it. What do you think? — Ed Dear Ed: It’s O.K. with me. But tell her to put on an apron when she’s frying bacon.
Dear Abby: Two men who claim to be father and adopted son just bought an old mansion across the street and fixed it up. We notice a very suspicious mixture of company coming and going at all hours — blacks, whites, Orientals, women who look like men and men who look like women. ... This has always been considered one of the finest sections of San Francisco, and these weirdos are giving it a bad name. How can we improve the neighborhood? — Nob Hill Residents Dear Residents: You could move.
Dear Abby: I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can’t afford to spend a lot of money to do it. Have you any suggestions? — M.J.B. in Oakland, Calif. Dear M.J.B.: Yes. Run for a public office.
20. Holographic Tupac: Tupac Shakur was shot in 1996, when most of the Coachella-going population was, like, 10. But when he was resurrected in the form of a hologram on the final night of the three-day music festival, the crowd went INSANE. It was like we had seen the past and the future at the same damn time. Unfortunately, a couple of months later, the company who brought us HT went bankrupt. Wah-wah...
18. Seapunks vs. Azealia and Rihanna: Seapunks united to decry Azealia Banks and Rihanna for having teal and turquoise hair and loving dolphins, because apparently only TRUE seapunks are allowed to have teal and turquoise hair and love dolphins. Oh yeah, and 'seapunk' was a thing.
12. Grimes: From her songs to her videos, her artwork and her style (not to mention the pussy rings), there are more than enough reasons to go ahead and crown her Miss 2012, Queen of the Electronic Universe.
11. We met Lisa Frank: We went to visit Lisa Frank in Tucson, Arizona. On the outside, we were like 'Oh yeah, NBD. Just another day here at Urban Outfitters,' but on the inside we were all like 'OMFG!!!!!@#$%^%W$FHOLYCRAPITSLISAFRANK' and were so excited we thought we might puke rainbows.
10. Lena Dunham and Girls: When it came to Lena Dunham's HBO show Girls, people either drank the Kool-Aid and dubbed in the best new show on TV; or gulped the haterade and denounced Dunham for everything from her weight to her famous parents and her all-white cast. Both camps are likely counting down the days until season two premieres in January.
8. Instagram: It's doubtful that there was a single second of 2012 that WAS NOT documented on Instagram. And if there was anyone out there who got nail art but failed to 'gram it, well, then, we feel bad for you—just think of all the 'Likes' you missed out on.
6. The US Gymnastics Team: At the 2012 Olympics, the US Gymnastics team took home the gold, and 16-year-old Gabby Douglas won the individual gold, becoming the first African-American woman to do so. McKayla was not impressed, and the Internet loved her for it.
5. Honey Boo-Boo: We're not going to go as far as Barbara Walters here, but if you don't know who this six-year-old is, you clearly have not read magazines, been on the internet, or turned on the TV this year. And the rest of us envy you, because we can't seem to get away.
4. Cats: They're still popular! As for the Official Cat of 2012 award, it has to be a tie between Lil Bub and Grumpy Cat (who's real name is Tard, no less). We take this to mean that the Internet is finally starting to value inner beauty. At least when it comes to cats.
3. LA Hip-Hop: After Odd Future dominated 2011—more for their behavior than their music—L.A. represented in an unassailable way in 2012 with Frank Ocean and Kendrick Lamar. Ocean's Channel Orange and Lamar's good kid, m.A.A.d citydominated year-end lists, and we can only imagine that up in hip-hop heaven, Tupac is giving Biggie some serious shit about it.
2012 may have been bad, may have been good, but whatever it was, it was definitely NOT boring. Here, we compiled a list of our favorite moments from the past 12 months. Full disclaimer: This list does not represent all of Urban Outfitters, just the blog team. And admittedly, we're a bunch of dorks who spend too much time on the internet, and the rest of the company probably has way better taste than we do. XOXO—The UO Blog
2012 was a year full of songs. Some of them were great, and some of them were not-so-great. Here are five of the not-so-great ones that need to stay in the black hole that will soon be 2012 and never come out.—Katie
Karmin "Brokenhearted" "'People look at Amy and expect her to be a straight-up pop singer, but she busts out a rap and she just slays it,' Nick Noonan says." Does she, Nick? Does she? (Hint: The answer is no.)
Train "50 Ways To Say Goodbye" Is Train a real band? Sometimes I can't tell. Sometimes they feel like a parody of a parody, what with their nonsensical lyrics and all. Am I missing something here? Are they in on the joke?Are they actually geniuses? Their songs do make them a gazillion dollars. What kind of witchcraft are you enchanting us with, Patrick Monahan?
Gotye "Somebody That I Used To Know" This one almost goes without saying, like "Call Me Maybe" (I love you, though, Carly), and I'm sure Gotye is a lovely man, but seriously—this song needs to blow away in the sands of time like all the other pop songs of yore. "Now you're just some single that I used to know." (See what I did there?)
Alex Clare "Too Close" I am so mad at this song because every time I hear it on that Internet Explorer commercial I find myself singing the one line "I FEEL SO CLOSE TO YOU RIGHT NOW" six hours after it airs, so damn you, Alex Clare.
Chris Brown "Don't Wake Me Up" Bye, Chris Brown. Just bye.
With the holidays coming up, we figured we'd teach you a thing or two about bow-ties. At the Urban Outfitters in Phoenix (11 Washington St., #100 City Scape), the Dapper Dash team will be setting up a pop-up shop where they will help teach men and women how to tie a proper bow-tie around their necks or in their hair. With a few simple tips and tricks, you'll be ready for any party for the rest of the year. -Ally
The closing party for Strange Magic was truly magic, and only a little bit strange. We roamed the dance floor and the gallery snapping pics with these disposable cameras (we had the fiesta, party and happy birthday versions), and found that they perfectly captured the alternate-universe feel of the night. You know, that alternate universe where everything in the real world is actually as cool as it is in your head.
Adam Yauch, better known as 'MCA' of the Beastie Boys, passed away today at age 47. Yauch was an idol in many ways—as an activist, director and member of one of the most ground-breaking hip-hop groups of all time—and he will be missed.
The lovely folks over at Space 15 Twenty put together this photo shoot to celebrate the last week of Hellawood and capture some of the awesome surf looks available in the shop. Stop by the Hellawood closing party this Friday from 7-10pm, and consider this week like that last long week of summer, when the water's still warm, but the air is cool and you know school is right around the corner. Yes, it is just that sad...
I did some extra work the day before to set myself up for an “easy” 117 mile final ride into Hanoi. It would be the first day for a while that I wouldn’t be climbing some massive mountain, so I thought it would go pretty smoothly, but I was wrong. Just about everything else got in my way.
I got up at 5:30AM and got on the road after eating some Oreos. Although I was in the mountains, I wasn’t at the top. There was a long, gradual climb, then some down, then more up. When I finally got on the descent, there was a thick fog all the way down. I could hardly see with the rain and fog on my glasses. When I got to the bottom, I had to start climbing another mountain all over again. On an empty stomach, it was a tough grind. On the descent of the second mountain, I passed a long line of stopped cars. There had been a rock slide, but luckily, the police let me ride through the road block. Boulders sat in the middle of the muddy road, but motorbikes and my bike were able to squeeze through.
It was a relief when I got out of the mountains and out of the fog. But as soon as I got on the flat, I had to fight the wind. Although I was pushing hard, I was crawling. Wind is probably the most frustrating thing when you’re cycling. With mountains, the agony is finite; you climb one side, and then you’re rewarded with the descent. But fighting the wind is endless.
In Hanoi, I arrived at the hotel where I had started the trip two month before. My ride was over, and no one was there recognize it, or celebrate it. It was a lonely, quiet victory. It felt good to be done."-Eoin