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Spooky Lit: The Turn of the Screw

At some point in your scholastic career you may have been assigned Henry James and thought, "Why are there so many words? Boring! I'm just gonna play my Tamagotchi in class." But James is a master stylist, and reading a scary story is a rare pleasure in the modern world of teen slasher flicks. Plus, this isn't even real book. It's a novella. That's a short novel. Also, it's available as a free ebook, so you have no excuses. Reading is good for you. 
The story takes place in England back in the day when "cars" were attached to horses, and has all the elements of a classically spooky story: a creepy old mansion, creepy kids, mysterious happenings, etc. I can't tell you what happens because that would ruin it for you, but I swear I read it and liked it. It's kind of like The Others, okay. That's all you get. Angelo

You Should Totally Be This For Halloween: A Loving Friend


When you become an adult, Halloween becomes less about ingesting dangerous amounts of candy and more about coming up with a super clever, funny, topical but ironic costume. The stress to outwit your friends can be paralyzing, so in college I decided rather than compete with my friends, I'd just dress up as one of them.  



[Editor's note: NO 40s UNLESS YOU'RE 21, CHILDREN! THESE DUDES ARE 21+. THEY ARE DOIN' IT RIGHT.]

This option works best if the person is well-loved and has an easily identifiable style. When I went as my friend Tim, which required only a flannel, jeans and a pair of New Balance, everybody still got it. You have to choose that type of person. The above photo shows me dressed as my friend Bob (left) with my friend Bob (right). Everyone in the world loves Bob, because he is the best, and everybody knows he wears big glasses and, often, a zip-up jacket. At the time, Bob worked at the Vans store, so I made a fake Vans name tag that said "Bob: Manager/Dreamboat." Let me tell you — the costume was a hit. Also, this works best if the person you're impersonating will be at the same party you're attending, otherwise it's kind of weird.

A disclaimer for any potential mean people out there: this is not about making fun of someone. It's not about wearing a trucker hat because "lame ass Jeff always wears a stupid trucker hat." It's about admiration, lighthearted fun and also being lazy about Halloween costumes. If the costume isn't somebody everybody will recognize and enjoy, it's borderline creepy. Okay, it's borderline creepy anyway, but in a cool way, I swear. Angelo

If you happen to have a friend who's exactly the same as Bob, here's how you can get the look:


Granger Readers


K-Way Claude Windbreaker Jacket


Vans Checkered Slip-On Sneaker

You Should Totally Be This For Halloween: Stevie Nicks, Likely Witch

My whole life I was told Stevie Nicks was a witch. My family is full of the type of people who will casually say "there's no question she's a witch," like that's a normal thing to do. So, I was a little disappointed when today I finally took to Google to find (in the Wikipedia section specifically titled "Rumors of Witchcraft,") that Stevie denies any association with Wicca. Whatever, Stevie. I've seen how you dress! I mean, between songs about "crystal visions," (on one of the best, mythically awesome albums of all time) and bestowing magical trinkets, I still lean toward the witch theory. Whatever you believe, if you dress as Stevie for Halloween, people will either think you're one of the iconic female singers of the century, or a witch. You're really dressed as both, so it's win, win...win. Angelo








Get the look:


Staring At Stars Boho Babydoll Dress


Staring At Stars Velvet Bell-Sleeve Cropped Top


Staring At Stars Embroidered Silky Fringe Jacket


Staring At Stars Lace Fringe Tunic Top


Staring At Stars Folkloric Fringe Tank

Wes Week: You Should Totally Be This For Halloween - Eli Cash


In honor of The Wes Anderson Collection book, we'll be showcasing costume ideas from some of our favorite Wes characters this week.

Wes Anderson films are a treasure trove of costume ideas because so many characters have distinctive, identifiable personal styles. But some Anderson characters have been overdone. (Richie Tenenbaum, amiright?) So why not venture out and try one of my all-time favorite characters, Richie's best friend and love-trangle-er, Eli Cash. Like anyone from The Royal Tenenbaums, Eli can be accomplished pretty easily with a couple trips to the thrift shop, but dedicated-ass Halloweeners will be particular to find the slightly smaller than average, sandy suede cowboy hat and the perfect fringed jacket. If you have a parent who was big in the line dance scene in the '80s, you might not have to shop at all. Angelo 



Take your Halloween game to another level by memorizing some Eli Cash quotes. I would be so impressed if I walked up to someone dressed as Cash and the first thing out of their mouth was "The crickets and the rust-beetles scuttled among the nettles of the sage thicket. 'Vamanos, amigos,' he whispered, and threw the busted leather flintcraw over the loose weave of the saddlecock. And they rode on in the friscalating dusklight." At the very least mutter "Wildcat" to yourself as an exit from the awkward conversation that ensued after a failed attempt to hit on a girl. 







If regular old Eli isn't your bag, opt for meltdown-car-crash Eli, complete with three-piece suit and wicked face paint. 


If you choose this route, you need to go hard enough that you end up on the floor with one show, contemplating the lamentable state of your life.

Get the look:



Buy The Wes Anderson Collection

Foreign Horror: Martyrs


October has arrived and you're in the mood for horror. You've seen all the American classics and the Japanese stuff is totally overrated. So watch Martyrs, the remorselessly violent, super scary but contemplative French movie from 2008. This the point in a review where I should write something like "Martyrs is the story of..." but this shit is too crazy to even summarize. In the beginning it seems like an ultra-violent revenge story, then it becomes an ultra-violent, what-the-fuck-is-that-scary-monster movie, and then, because it's French, the movie asks us (violently) to ponder the nature of life and death and the limbo that may exist between them. It sounds a bit confusing, but the varying plots ask you to find the connection between them, leading to an ultimately satisfying ending. Being clear: it's a good movie.

Being clear again, Martyrs is hard to watch. But what do we do with unsettling things? Make light of them with screen caps and jokes, obvi. Plus you need to watch it so when that asshole horror buff in your film studies class is getting all pretentious you can be like "Bro, have you seen Martyrs?" and he'll be like "...No. What's that?" and you can be like "LOL bro aren't you up on French horror?" and he'll feel all stupid. Unless he has seen it, then you guys can bond like "Dude isn't it fucked up?" and high five and become lifelong friends. Angelo




Archival footage, a staple of any good horror film, featuring scary nun with bike.



Great winter style: beanie (I mean toque,) trench and a shotgun.



It's French so the girls are obviously flawless.



Hi guyssss!



This is the still I sent to my horror-buff friend to explain why he should see Martyrs.



Then this scary old lady shows up and stuff starts getting existential, LIKE ANY GOOD FRENCH MOVIE SHOULD.



I'm not going to tell you what's up in this scene but believe me, it's rough.



And it all comes down to this one moment, a whisper spoken from the brink of death, and you're either like "Ohhhhh," or "What???" but either way it makes you want to watch the movie again (in a couple months, after your stomach has settled down).

The Secret Language of Birthdays

The Secret Language of Birthdays will explode your brain. I first flipped through it after seeing it on the bookshelf of a kooky old lady (possibly a witch) at my old job. The book has a page for people born on each day of the year and the "personology profiles" are scary accurate. And not just cute, coincidental accurate like a Teen Vogue horoscope that happens to predict your new crush, but creepily, semi-troubling accurate. Plus, each day of the year has a cool name like "Day of the Cryptic Secret." 


After tripping on my own page, I started photocopying my friends' birthday pages and sending them to the friends, who were mostly like "Hey, don't read my page, I don't want you to know my inner secrets!" But it's not all bad - the book gives a positive meditation guide for every profile and ways to maximize the positives of your personality. If you can track this book down, check it out and share it with your friends and family and make them all depressed.

For an internet friendly run-down, you can also check out the Birthday Horoscope Tumblr that we visited a few weeks ago. Angelo

Cat Costume Ideas from Salem Saberhagen

When you get old, dressing up for Halloween is more hassle than fun, but forcing your cat into a costume is a hoot regardless of age. Who better to seek out for inspiration than Salem? (Really, who better? He's a black cat on a show about witches.) 

Salem, the cynical and creepily un-lifelike puppet kept Sabrina in check, doling out the kind of tough-love advice a teen witch needs and only a cat can provide. I could write an essay about cats as spiritually aware beings and why cats and supernatural figures like witches probably connect on a transcendent level but like, let's just talk about costumes for now. Angelo


It's October so...



...see what I did there, letting the GIF talk for me like the kids do. Okay, moving on.



Pimp cat: Like Jay-Z famously said, "Kitties is pimps too, go and lick your shoulder off."



Stoned chef cat, because cats basically have the munchies all the time anyway.



If your cat is old enough to remember Tae Bo, it's probably dead. Sorry to bring it up.



DIY idea: Coffin litter box, so you can not clean it and when people complain about it stinking you can just be like "Yeah, it smells like death, duh!"



Jamaican cat: Possibly offensive if your cat is not black.



This was just a scary image. Happy Meowoween folks!

Vinyl 101: '90s Rock

Back in the '90s your favorite bands didn't put out records on vinyl. Why would they? COMPACT DISCS WERE THE HEIGHT OF MUSICAL TECHNOLOGY. Most of these albums are still sitting in the lonely 200-CD flip case on the floor of my car. But now you can get your favorite '90s rock albums in a medium that actually fits their warm, grungy vibe. Let's skip down this lane of not-that-long-ago nostalgia because that's what we youngs do best. Angelo 



Nirvana - Bleach 
Sure you could buy the deluxe box set of Nirvana's more famous album, but purists will always be drawn to Bleach, which was famously made for like $600 and before Dave Grohl came along and...made them a better band. Before real studios and producers helped Kurt and company reluctantly shape a more radio friendly Nevermind vibe, the band had the freedom for quick, heavy cuts like "Negative Creep." This album was technically made in 1989 but whatever. 


Green Day - Dookie
Bro I actually had this album on a cassette tape which I listened to in my Walkman. If you're too young to have owned a Walkman, take a walk, man! (Slaps knee.) Also, if you're too young to have owned a Walkman, you probably only know Green Day as a terrible group of old dudes in eyeliner who make unlistenable songs like "Boulevard of Broken Dreams." But back in my day Green Day just made simple pop-punk songs about fun stuff like smoking pot and masturbating. 


No Doubt - Tragic Kingdom
The year was 1996. Gwen Stefani was young, bomb.com and for some reason wore a sticker on her forehead. She had just broken up with No Doubt bassist Tony Kanal (drama!) which led to not the album's best song, but the song that got No Doubt onto stations your mom listened to, catapulting Gwen and the bros into stardom. 


Bush - Sixteen Stone
Gwen Stefani dumped her bassist to eventually marry Bush's pretty-boy frontman Gavin Rossdale, who is tight because he was randomly in The Bling Ring as a skeezy club owner. Anyway, it's easy to dismiss Bush as tepid radio rock until you look back at this album and remember there was a time when records would have like five songs on the radio. Does that happen anymore? None of the songs on Sixteen Stone are as good as "Mouth" from the band's follow-up, Razorblade Suitcase, but it's still solid throughout. 


Sublime - Self-Titled
This album produced three lasting hits: "What I Got," "Wrong Way," and "Santeria," but "Pawn Shop" is built on one of the decade's most underrated bass grooves and "April 29, 1992" was how white kids who didn't listen to N.W.A. or Public Enemy learned about racial injustice. 


Incubus - S.C.I.E.N.C.E.
The kids probably don't even know Incubus made albums in the '90s, but after their first, mushroom-inspired album Fungus Amongus (which was interesting but needed to chill a bit) and before the band couldn't decide whether they wanted to rap or make acoustic love songs, Incubus created 1997's gem: S.C.I.E.N.C.E. None of the album's tracks blew up, which is sad because "Summer Romance" and "Deep Inside" are better than any of the band's later radio hits. 

Vinyl 101: Neil Young "Time Fades Away"

Neil Young's Time Fades Away is a noted classic not only as a rare collection of songs, but also as the only Neil album never released on CD (that's okay, though; it's readily available on vinyl, and you have a record player, right?) The album was recorded on tour immediately after Harvest made Neil a star. Alcoholism, drug overdoses and a continually rotating cast of disgruntled musicians made the tour particularly troublesome for Neil, which many speculate is the reason why he's never wanted the album put out on compact disc. 

Despite the context, Time Fades Away is regarded as a top-five Neil Young record, though audiences who had come out to see Neil's folkier Harvest set were supposedly turned off by the previously unheard tracks. The album oscillates unapologetically from classic Crazy Horse — driving blues-rock riffs on tracks like "L.A." and "The Last Dance" — and comparatively naked, slow songs such as "Journey Through the Past" and the perfectly brief "Love in Mind." Track down the album on vinyl, and if your friends don't know what you're talking about, ask your dad. He probably remembers Time Fades Away fondly. Angelo

Marvin Gaye "I Heard it Through the Grapevine" Vocal Isolation

If you were looking to head into September with some serious chills, then let Marvin serenade you into oblivion. This isolated vocal track from Gaye's Motown classic "I Heard it Through the Grapevine" has deservedly been piling up the listens this week. Throw it on and when some old head is like "They don't make em like they used to," remember this video and be like "Yeah, you're right." Angelo

Movie Style: The Dreamers


Spoiler alert: The Dreamers is a really creepy movie. But it's about people in the '60s in France, so it's obviously tres chic. (That means stylish right? I mean that this movie is stylish.) The awesome Michael Pitt, awesome-r Eva Green and some other good looking guy basically hang out and talk about pretentious films but also have weird sex for two hours. Oh, and smoking. There's a lot of smoking. Don't smoke. But do dress like the kids in The Dreamers. Angelo





Smoking is not tight, but if your cigarettes are red, it looks kind of tight. 








Pitt peeing in the sink is the least creepy thing that happens in this movie. 


Levi's and Chucks: never not a good option. 







Oh shit, mom and dad are home, and all we've been doing is hanging out naked. 


Oh shit, there's some sort of revolution happening and I don't understand the historical context but look at that great sweater.

Get the look:


Converse Chuck Taylor All Star Women's High-Top Sneaker


Levi's 511 Rinsed Playa Jean


Quay Kittie Cat-Eye Sunglasses


Coincidence & Chance Baby Corduroy Overall Skirt


UO Watch Cap


Kimchi Blue Velvet Skater Dress

Movie Style: The Science of Sleep

I hadn't seen The Science of Sleep since my freshman year of college, when I thought I was smart and artsy but didn't get it. Now that I am old and totally smart and artsy I watched it again and... still didn't really get it, but I'm pretty sure the point of the movie is that if you're chic and sexy and French, like Charlotte Gainsbourg, you can basically wear any old drab thrift shop looking thing and still be super chic and sexy and French. Also, in your dreams you can wear whatever crazy shit you want and it's all good. That applies in real life, too, because who cares but also because maybe being awake is actually dreaming and dreaming is the real world!

Anyway... everyone in this film has a general uniform of a few items they wear in different iterations. There's probably some like, thematic, symbolic reason why, but who has time to figure that shit out? All I'm thinking about is how dreaming is tight and can it be fall now? I want to buy sweaters and hang out with Charlotte and smoke cigarettes in France. Can that just happen now? Angelo







Charlotte makes grandma sweaters sexy. 




"What are you wearing?" "It's punk." Don't mind that play button, it's supposed to be there, I swear. 


You wouldn't even be mad if your mom dated a guy in a leather vest because leather vests are dope. 


These people are supposed to be boring and drab but they're French so they're actually mostly on point. 






Another awesome Charlotte sweater.


Wow, it's not even a sweater, it's a badass sweater dress. 


Oof, it's a hot ass sweater dress. 


But this guy is an asshole, as indicated by the striped sweater. 


Back to the gold ol' granny knit, phew. 


Just driving a cardboard car, nbd. 


Sweater dress again, nothing makes sense! But paired nicely with the parka. 





Here's a different knit. What does it mean?!? 


Andddd let's end on this guy because he's a badass.

Basically, we should all just buy some sweaters.

Interview: Rob Guillory of Chew

Rob Guillory is the artist behind Chew, the witty, gory, awesome-y comic that has become a favorite of mine and hordes of others over the past few years. Written by John Layman, Chew takes place in an alternate reality wherein food regulation has evolved to violent extremes. I talked with Guillory about the process behind making Chew come to life, sneaking in pop culture critiques and styling protagonist/cannibal Tony Chu. Angelo

What is your process like working with writer John Layman? Does the art or story take shape first?
John hits me with a full script first. His scripts are detailed enough to give me a feel for what he's envisioning, but loose enough to really let me experiment and put my own stamp on it. From there, I pencil, ink and color it (with my color assistant Taylor Wells). Then Layman letters it, and Image Comics shoots it to the printers. A standard issue takes about 5 weeks from start to finish.

I ask because I was wondering: there are tons of pop-culture references littered throughout Chew — things like TPS reports (from Office Space) and Paula Deen posters — do these things come from you or John or both?
I do about 90% of them. I'm the bigger pop culture fan of the two of us, so I just throw them in as fun little extra content. They're not crucial to the story, but they're fun bonuses for attentive readers.



Chew obviously deals a lot with modern food culture, processing, celebrity chefs — was this an area of interest to you before working on the comic?
Nope! I have a love/hate relationship with food, so I would've never come up with a food-centric comic. Layman loves food far more than I do.

If the FDA was really a militarized organization in 2013, who would they be busting?
I wish they'd bust the guy that thought serving a Lobster Sub at Quizno's was a good idea. He's a sick man.


Does Tony have a particular style? Do use any references for how Tony dresses?
Tony is a complete square, so when he's not in basic black suits, he's usually in muted colors. Because of his generally grim demeanor, I view him as sort of a former-Goth, so I always put him in drab unexciting clothes.

Your illustrations have a bit of the frenetic energy of a fashion sketch and details that make me think you're someone that pays attention to clothing. Is that just me projecting or do you have an interest in fashion?
I didn't have any interest in fashion... until I met my wife, who's big on fashion. So in the nearly ten years we've been together, I've developed a real appreciation for well-made clothing and accessories. My latest acquisition is a really sturdy bag from Chrome that is just friggin' EPIC.



Comic Style: Hazel of Seconds

Bryan Lee O'Malley's next book Seconds isn't out until 2014, but the Scott Pilgrim author has released a few sketches of the book's primary character, Hazel, who looks destined to become a certified comic style icon. O'Malley is very active on his Tumblr and in the past has written about finding character style inspiration in the fashion blogosphere. Early looks at Seconds seem to indicate the book may be grounded more in the "real world" than the superhero universe of Scott Pilgrim. Superpowers or not, Hazel looks to have the cozy-cute-girl (swoon) game on lock. Angelo




The Physics "Take a Win"

I've been bumping "Take a Win" by Seattle rap group The Physics since their album Tomorrow People dropped awhile back, and now there's an equally dope video to accompany the track. The Physics first entered my radar mainly because MC Thig Nat is one of the best dressed rappers in the game regardless of locale, but with tracks like this perfectly backdropping my summertime grind, the group has been popping up more and more in my daily iPod rotation. Keep an eye on The Physics as they look to become the new torchbearers of the eternally underrated Northwest hip-hop scene. Angelo

100% Unofficial Simpsons Comix

100% Unofficial Simpsons Comix is a new compilation from Jack Teagle, an illustrator and one of my favorite frequent contributors to the Simpsons Drawing Club we told you about awhile back. Teagle's comics take the iconic characters on dystopian adventures, playing on both classic Simpsons themes and modern commentaries. Pick up a copy for only like $4.50 US, and maybe Fox will sue Teagle, which is the best way for an artist to gain notoriety anyway. —Angelo




Camp Style: Heavyweights

Heavyweights is a seminal coming of age story about a group of husky bros who just want to ride go-karts and enjoy some candy but can't because the new asshole camp director is trying to make them lose weight for his infomercial. It's also one of only three good Ben Stiller movies. And whoa, Heavyweights was co-written by Judd Apatow? No wonder I remember it fondly (and actually, re-watching it as an "adult," I caught way more of the dark humor that went way over my boyish head.) 


More importantly, Heavyweights was made smack dab in the middle of the '90s. It has Kenan! And Goldberg from Mighty Ducks! The 1995 film serves as a perfect time capsule of that glorious decade's best summer trends, many of which have probably reappeared in recent years among members of your hip young peer group. Angelo


The hot new nurse in denim mom shorts and the short striped tee. Takes me back. 


Lifestyles of the cozy, Goldberg's iconic Adidas sweatsuit. 


Again, bucket hats are camping, but I'm more interested in Jerry Stiller's next-level short-sleeved popover with the anorak pocket. 


Creepin'.



The only thing more awkward than a middle school dance: a fat camp dance. 


This girl is listed as "Angelic Girl," which is a pretty bad ass credit to have. 


And how do you land an angelic girl? With a Les Mis shirt!


Blossom hat! Nothing is more '90s than a Blossom hat. Nothing. 


Ben looking like Jerry Seinfeld on steroids and generally not someone I would let watch my kids. 


Kenan in Stussy and a Marley tee, very real. 


Ben actually looking like dudes I see in Portland, running tights and Nikes. 


Very camp, very rugged. 

Camp Style: Goosebumps

The Goosebumps TV show from 1995 is on Netflix and well, okay, maybe it's a little light on actual style, but that doesn't diminish the fact that Goosebumps is on Netflix! I just re-watched the epic two-part "Welcome to Camp Nightmare," and um, sure it wasn't as good or scary as I remember, but who cares, nostalgia is the most powerful force in the world. Besides, the epic miniseries featured ample flannel, a bevy of bowl cuts and even a chain wallet. When are chain wallets coming back? Anytime now, right? I'll be waiting. —Angelo


"Sup boo? I like your denim vest."


This is the '90s I remember...but would like to forget. 

But this guy looks like your friend who plays synth in a cool electro-country band.

Damn, aside from sunglass bro, these guys pretty much have my wardrobe down pat. 

Expertly cast doucher teenage camp counselors. Bowl cut rating 9/10. 

I told you bucket hats were great for camping!

Trend: Camp Hats

Camp hats! They're a lot like five-panel caps, but usually have a nylon strap in the back and overall less structure — because structure is for the school year and it's summertime, bitches. Really though camp hats, the lighter little brother to baseball caps, are perfect for summer when you need to keep the sun out of your grill but aren't trying to have your head be all sweaty. Plus, we've got them in a bunch of wild patterns, which is great for blending in with the foliage, which is important when trying to stealthily steal beer from unassuming camp dads. Angelo


This hat has wolves on it, which is great for going out into nature, communing with wolves. Warning: may be offensive to wolves. 

This hat has space girls on it, which is great for going out into nature and hallucinating about communing with space girls. 

This collaboration from two Northwest brands, Coal and Otter Wax, is waxed for your protection, because even if it's summer in the Northwest it's probably still raining. 

The Stately hat is for classy camping trips, but I don't know anything about classy camping trips. 

Grape God - A.G.E.

Portland rapper Grape God's first full-length album A.G.E. surfs the space time continuum between traditional West Coast crunk and metaphysical spoken word poetry. The physical copy of the album also comes with custom artisanal soap by Maak Soap Lab, which is pretty Portland for sure, but also necessary, because the beats are dirty. A.G.E. throws down on a spectrum of subject matter, from time travel to Big Lebowski references to the necessary blunts and brews. It's the perfect companion to an altered-substance Saturday. Angelo